Living in a Break Up World

My son gets all the serious talking done right when I send him to bed. One reason is that he gets thoughtful and contemplative once alone in bed. Another reason is that he loves an excuse to extend his time awake and cuddle up on the sofa and sneak a peak at grown up TV...Last night we discussed his father's new girlfriend again (I told him about it myself because his father would not, but his father would however, make him share a bed with this "friend" and make him spend his weekend with his father at this "friend's" house and bake his father's birthday cake and attend his father's birthday dinner with said "friend"; what a mighty mighty special friend that is!). We also discussed his frustrations with his father for not talking to him about issues and for making him share said bed. We agreed we would request the purchase of a sleeping bag for next weekend with Papa. He upgraded to "one of those air beds with a pump"; I agreed that is a feasible request.

Then he asked me if his father's having a new girlfriend meant he would have to switch moms. Because he really did not want to. It took a lot of invisible men handling me and strapping me down to with invisible chains to my chair to keep me from screaming and shaking him and saying WHAT THE FUCK EVER GAVE YOU THE FUCKING IDEA THAT I WOULD EVER EVER EVER EVER STOP BEING YOUR MOTHER, LET ALONE THAT THIS OBSCENE CHANGE WOULD HAPPEN ON OCCASION OF SWAPPING ME FOR YOUR FATHER'S NEW LITTLE FUC--you get the idea... Instead what happened was lots of very tight, very repetitive hugs and explanations and drawings of family trees...And conforting words like "no matter what" and "forever" and "ever" and "always" and "this changes nothing between you and I."

Then he asked me whether she was his stepmom and I said he should ask his father. I don't know frankly that this is a permament relationship and I don't want my son's emotional life turned into a circus for his father's benefit. I remember very acutely my mother force-feeding me her first boyfriend after their divorce, basically orchestrating my falling-in-love with the idea of a new father figure when the romance was so clearly volatile and short-lived. Instead of the one heartache and torture of losing my parents being together, I had that in close succession to the loss of a new so-called Parental figure, just because adults are sloppy. And selfish. So no kid, I don't know that she is your stepmom. But for now, how about she is a great friend?

And finally he (astutely) seemed to change topics into my making him a list, by dictation of things he prays to God for a lot but is "pretty sure [he's] not gonna get." It reads:
Things I Pray To God For But Am Pretty Sure I'm Not Gonna Get"
1. A watch like "Ben 10" that can make me transform into anything even fictional things.
2. Me being a member of the Venom family with my own special costume.
3. My parents being back together and me not living in a break up world.